Good morning dear Reader and Happy Easter......Further to my blog on my Alcoholic poisoning, I had to write to you today after reading an article in the Sunday paper.....It made me realise that I could very well indeed be afflicted and my liver was in serious trouble.....
I was both amused and horrified that a Sunday newspaper would even publish an article about your poo, but, there it was, in black & white.....I thought I would share with you so that you too may know your poo on an intimate basis, as I do now.......After all, the article went on to say, and I quote, that "your poo is a veritable treasure and too valuable to flush down the loo!" Hmmmmm! I am still wondering what you would do with it otherwise....frame it and drag it out to show visitors?
The first poo they mentioned was what they called the "perfect poo". This is the poo that is about the size and shape of a banana, not too hard and not too soft....(sounds a bit like a nursery rhyme, doesn't it?)....I was hooked now and had to read further.....The next poo was the "Deja Poo". Now this poo is bad because it has undigested pieces of food in it and apparently your digestive system may be in need of support....I am thinking by this stage that while I don't actually have the perfect poo, I am okay in the digestive department and my system doesn't need support....
The next poo was the "pebbly poo"....This is the one that looks like little pebbles you would normally see in a field....you know, sheep, goat or as the article stated, worse still, a guinea pig! Shock, horror! This is bad because you may be holding stress in your bowel..... Crikeys, I'm glad I haven't got that one......My bowel doesn't need to be stressed as well as my brain.....It would mean that I am running stress from both ends......At least, I suppose, if I had this one, I could sit on it!
There was also the "Darth Vader Poo"! That's the poo whereby you have either been eating too much spinach, (iron) or you are in very serious trouble because there could be blood in your poo.....get straight to a doctor........The "Slime poo" frightened the death out of me......Just the image that jumped into my brain of a slime poo, made me feel sick.....This indicated that the normal mucous membranes that secrete mucus to allow easy passage of poo, could very well be inflamed.....Now, the one that made me sit up and take the most notice of, was the "Skid Mark Poo"!
This is the one that leaves "indelible skid marks on the toilet bowel".....I just saw those words and panicked.....I realise that this is very personal and probably I am giving you way too much information about my habits, but, this indicated that your gall bladder or liver may be in trouble.....I went into panic mode......Thinking that I may have committed attempted murder on my own liver by sucking up all those bottles of wine last week, I got very depressed and almost reached for the bottle to drown my sorrows, but, I held myself firm and was determined to fix my liver up.....The article also went on to say that the poo would be smelly, sticky and difficult to flush.......Oh shit, I thought, I am in trouble.......although, I must say, that there must be a lot of people with the same problem around the traps, as every public loo I have ever been in at the shopping centres smells to high heaven.......
The article went on to say that by drinking lemon juice in hot water each morning and not drinking alcohol would help......Logical! So dear Reader, you are now armed with much more information then you probably needed or even wanted but, I am doing you all a favour by making you aware of all the different poo's. I thank the universe for sending me this timely article in the Sunday paper so that I may correct the error of my ways.
This morning I had lemon juice in my hot water and felt so much better for it......I am feeling better today because I am determined to put to rights the damage I have inflicted on my poor liver......Good thing one can't be held up for attempted murder on one's own liver, isn't it?
Hi, At 59 I am just finding my feet in the world...So exciting! I have learnt a lot over the years.....gone from being extremely hard up to living a very comfortable life and loving every single minute of it.......My boys are grown up and living good lives themselves and I am so proud of them.......I have the best husband in the world (most of the time anyway....hahaha) and I have 3 dogs who I just adore and they adore me...... I try to live by my motto ......"Be like the sun....let your warmth shine through always"